zodiacbaby:

*talking to myself as I wobble up the stairs* , you are sober and in control of the situation

(via metal-marble)

49,114 notes

Favorite MoviesThe Proposal

"Three days ago, I loathed you. I used to dream about you getting hit by a cab. Then we had our little adventure up in Alaska and things started to changed. Things changed when we kissed. And when you told me about your tattoo. Even when you checked me out when we were naked. But I didn’t realize any of this, until I was standing alone… in a barn… wifeless. Now, you could imagine my disappointment when it suddenly dawned on me that the woman I love is about to be kicked out of the country. So Margaret, marry me, because I’d like to date you."

(via metal-marble)

26,776 notes

lemonysnickets-dickpickets:

colamania:

spazztastikim:

comebackxkid:

dynastylnoire:

insidehishead:

some of the most sensitive areas of the female body

look at all the regions that are not titties and vagina guys
porn has lied to you. there are other places you can touch that sensitive and pleasurable. 

Oh yeah because I’m just gonna rub her eyes until a she’s horny

Kiss her there you walnut! Use tenderness! Hold her face gently and stroke her eyelids with your thumb and then kiss them! Run your hands down to her neck when you do! THINK!!! Lordie, you have a lot to learn that TOUCH gives more than making her “horny” you’ll drive her nuts doing gentle stuff! It’s trust! It’s care! It’s sensitivity! *smacks your forehead* You want her to be numb in complete ecstasy! I know this shit and I’m ASEXUAL! 

lemonysnickets-dickpickets:

colamania:

spazztastikim:

comebackxkid:

dynastylnoire:

insidehishead:

some of the most sensitive areas of the female body

look at all the regions that are not titties and vagina guys

porn has lied to you. there are other places you can touch that sensitive and pleasurable. 

Oh yeah because I’m just gonna rub her eyes until a she’s horny

Kiss her there you walnut! Use tenderness! Hold her face gently and stroke her eyelids with your thumb and then kiss them! Run your hands down to her neck when you do! THINK!!! Lordie, you have a lot to learn that TOUCH gives more than making her “horny” you’ll drive her nuts doing gentle stuff! It’s trust! It’s care! It’s sensitivity! *smacks your forehead* You want her to be numb in complete ecstasy! I know this shit and I’m ASEXUAL! 

(via metal-marble)

371,767 notes

I fell in love with this puppy tonight. I also named him Dierks and I got to cuddle him 😍❤️ (at Puppies In Love San Tan Mall)

I fell in love with this puppy tonight. I also named him Dierks and I got to cuddle him 😍❤️ (at Puppies In Love San Tan Mall)

The cruiser got a new addition. A little Minnie Mouse bow :) 🎀 #Disneyland #disney #minniemouse

The cruiser got a new addition. A little Minnie Mouse bow :) 🎀 #Disneyland #disney #minniemouse

2 notes

#minniemouse

#disneyland

#disney

Some of the express team who wore red white and blue yesterday!

Some of the express team who wore red white and blue yesterday!

onlylolgifs:

Pug goes crazy in his first ball pit!

(via daddyslittletrophywife)

88,137 notes

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